How many times have you wanted to change but have run into people who just tell you that that change you want is not going to happen, that things won't work out because that's "not life" and you're better off just doing the same things you and everybody else has been doing all along? I call these people "vampires", because they suck out your energy and optimism, but they are more commonly known as "saboteurs". And, I get it, change is hard and, for some people, seeing their friends change makes them feel uncomfortable because their environment is changing and they no longer feel in control. This happens even more often when it is someone who you're close to. Let me share with you some brief stories to which you will probably relate:
1. I don't drink, nor smoke, nor do drugs. Never have and never will. I have tried alcohol before, a sip here and there, but never to the point of drinking beer after beer until getting drunk. I honestly have never gotten drunk. So, usually, most people drink and have a lot of fun during the weekends. What do I get when I say I don't drink? "You need to live", "I don't trust people who don't drink", "I'm going to get you drunk one of these days. I wonder what kind of person you are when drunk".
2. At a party I always stay away from dynamite food (junk food, processed food, gluten food, fried food, artificial stuff, etc.) so, I am very picky about what I eat (I mean, I only have one body and it is my responsibility to care entirely for it!) and what do I get? "You are being rude", "Nothing's going to happen if you try this once", "Loosen up a little, it's just French fries".
3. At family gatherings, after not seeing some relatives for a while, they make you your favorite comfort food you used to eat when you were a kid, because it's OK to have a cheat meal, because "you're too skinny", "you're too healthy and you are going to die, anyway".
4. When you sign up for an event, even if you have been training for a while some people will say "You should do less than that, go for the easy one.", "That one? You? You're going to fail. You've never done one of those before!"
Do these scenarios sound familiar? I've been through these and many more, but I've stood my ground and not let these comments affect me. So, you may ask "well, Michelle, you must have a very strong willpower to do this!" Well, it's not just willpower (it's actually a finite resource, so, not good to rely just on it) but it all has to do with the strong "why" that I talked about in a previous article. Besides that, thinking about the outcome of taking that action is what will make you consider whether to go for it or not. How about how you feel? Do you feel any different if you do take a bite of that "cheat meal"? How does that affect your overall health, performance and the way you feel the next day? Is it really worth it? Once you start rationalizing impulses and social pressure you are more able to stand your ground.
Another thing that works is knowing and defining yourself based on actions. If you say "I'm an athlete. Athletes put only the best into their bodies" then, guess what?, you are going to do the same! Same with things you don't do. If you say "I don't eat fried food because it's damaging to my metabolism or mitochondria" you will have enough of a reason to say "no" to that food people are so asking you to eat.
Another thing to keep in mind is who the advise comes from. I, honestly, wouldn't take a piece of advice from someone who looks opposite to what they suggest. Take for instance, a person who tells you the way to earning a lot of money is X way, and they are broke and barely make it towards the end of the month. Would it be smart to listen to what they say? Or should you become friends with someone who has earned a lot of money and who may want to share with you how they got that far?
At the end of the day, you have to keep one thing in mind... It is you, at the end, who are responsible for your choices. You have the power to change what you do, to decline or accept what others suggest, and, regardless of whether the result will be good or bad, it's yours. It'll help you evaluate what you did, and then you can decide whether to continue, improve or stop doing something.
When people start doubting themselves because they listen to "their friends"' suggestions but in their hearts they know and feel they should be doing something else, I just tell them "Go for it". Because, you will never know the result unless you take a leap of faith. Trust me, I've been through this many times and I, responsibly, just jump at the situation in front of me. So... Take yours, be adventurous, and live without regretting what you could've done. Start living today!
Comments
Post a Comment